I’m deep into theFinal Fantasy 7 Rebirth endgamenow, with only a few side quests left to conquer before I can wear my completionist badge with pride. One thing I didn’t think to consider was the Gold Saucer, and the manyamusements and minigamesfound within the garish, Mako-powered monument to capitalism.
After mopping up all the quests in the open world and growing bored with combat simulator battles, I returned to the theme park to go on dates with my entire party. Then I jumped over to Wonder Square and found myself sucked into arcade heaven. Every game now boasts an expert mode to conquer, not to mention the cool costumes and similar unlockables to claim with my hard-earned points. After several hours, I didn’t want to leave.
The only notable absence in Gold Saucer right now is the snowboarding minigame, although a mural teases its eventual addition alongsidetwo queer girlsfawning over it.
How Does Chocobo Racing Work In Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth?
After losing most of my evening to arcade games, I pulled myself away and walked over to Chocobo Square in search of friends. Along the way, I stumbled across a quest that asked me to compete in chocobo racing for a ranch hand friend of mine, an activity I hadn’t partaken in beyond the single mandatory race found in the main quest. Not one to turn down a challenge, I approached the front desk and signed up. Then I quickly realised that Square Enix has snuck an entire kart racer into this already massive RPG.
There is more depth to this thing than it has any right to be. Like a vehicle in Mario Kart, chocobos can be equipped with a variety of clothing that affects stats, while different coloured birds gathered across your travels can be brought into races with a laundry list of variables to consider. Each one has unique skills and perks, alongside a cool ability that can be used during races that might speed them up or slow down others, acting as an ultimate ability of sorts that can turn a losing race into a winning one.
You’ll want to go for the attributes each outfit gives you instead of overall looks, even if it means leaving your feathery rizz behind for a brief moment.
The tracks are sorted into three tiers - Bronze, Silver, and Gold - while tracks exist inside a luscious theme park filled with garish colours, undersea wonders, and plenty of references that Final Fantasy fans will spend hours picking apart. You’ll often be moving so quickly that you’ll struggle to notice them however, since the tiers are like the 50, 100, and 150cc variants found in Mario Kart. Things get faster and more chaotic with each new track, where knowledge of the route and when to drift and use shortcuts is paramount. Oh yes, your chocobo can drift as well.
With a touch of the shoulder button you can skid around corners, earning a healthy boost for chaining them together or going a long distance, although this will also feed into your speed level, which is increased by collecting blue balloons found across the track. These are like item boxes in other kart racers, but Rebirth prefers to pepper obstacles onto the track instead of putting too much power in the hands of players. You’ll find pinball-esque bounce pads and cactuar doors that open and close, alongside bodies of water that will slow you to crawl if you fail to properly move around them. I didn’t expect to take chocobo racing so seriously, and now I’m lamenting the lack of couch co-op or online play.
There’s even a multi-quest story arc attached to winning the Gold Cup with cutscenes that wouldn’t look out of place in the main narrative, not to mention worthwhile rewards when you place top of the leaderboard and keep on improving your stable of birds. Square Enix would be wise to update this mode with additional themed tracks in the future, because I’m already keen to go back and master the tracks and bird variants I haven’t touched yet.
Final Fantasy Rebirth does so much so well, including many minigames, but I don’t think any go quite as hard as Chocobo Racing. In the original, the controls made little sense and all the visuals resembled an anime fever dream, but here it feels far more consistent, confident, and worth sinking hours into. In fact, it’s the best kart racer I’ve played since MK8 Deluxe - way better than Chocobo GP.
Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth
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Final Fantasy Rebirth is the second part of the FF7 Remake project. It continues the story of Cloud Strife, a former SOLDIER turned mercenary who joins Avalanche, a group of eco-terrorists seeking to save the planet from the malevolent Sephiroth. As the party pushes out of Midgar, leaving the Shinra Corporation devastated, where will their paths take them?
